It was the week before Christmas when I got the call from my Mom, her doctor just called with her results, she has breast cancer. The words were like a knife to my heart. I had so many questions. “Where are you?” I said. “On my way to your house.” She said. I only had a few minutes to get some answers. As soon as I hung up I cried out to God I could barely get the words out, all I could say was, “Father God, what’s going on with my mom.” And He said, “This is not unto death but to draw her.” There was a knock at my door, it was my mom. As I walked to the door I went over in my mind what God said to me and when I opened the door only one thought filled my heart…I will not cry, I will not doubt.. I will stand on His promise.
I went to every appointment, saw the x-rays, heard the horror stories and saw the fear on my mother’s face, yet I did not cry… I did not doubt… I stood on God’s promise. Her surgery was 2 days before Christmas and as she laid in that hospital bed tears rolling down her face my heart wanted to break but I did not cry, I did not doubt I placed my hands on her chest and quietly prayed over her. At this point in our journey I was living off of a little sleep, take-out and hospital food but I didn’t feel weary. There was a strength in me that wasn’t my own. A strength that kept me strong, kept me sharp and confident that God will do what He said He would do. In the weeks to come I saw God’s hand all around us. He gave us favor with the doctor’s, the nurses, the staff, strangers went out of their way to welcome us, help us, make us laugh and even find treats for us.
The recovery and the treatments were pretty rough but I wasn’t moved by what I saw. The chemo tearing away at her, changing her, ripping what I know to be my mom, a vibrant, independent woman, away from us. What moved me was the greater Spirit that was in me, a Spirit that embraced us, went ahead of us and perfectly orchestrated every appointment and every procedure. That’s what encouraged me and gave me hope. God’s promise was all I chose to see.
It’s been 4 ½ years, since that life-changing call. After the surgery, the chemo and the radiation my mom emerged healthy, strong, vibrant, cancer free and saved (Hallelujah!)For my birthday my mother wrote me a very beautiful letter. In it she thanked me for being there, for never complaining, for never allowing her to feel sorry for herself or fall apart. She confessed her belief in God to me and said that it was all because she saw God in me, she felt His strength and His presence in me and around me and for the first time during our breast cancer journey …I cried.
I learned something about God’s grace that day; that if you take yourself out of the way God will take you all of the way. I thank God for saving, healing and drawing my mom. I thank Him for using me and for giving me the courage and the strength to stand. Thanks to God I can spend another Mother’s day with my mom. I want to encourage you in this season of your life by letting you know that there is no disease, no addiction, no pain or heartbreak in your life that is too big for our God to handle. He will help you, He will heal you and He will give you the courage and the strength to stand. In Jesus name I pray that God’s grace and peace be multiplied to you today, Amen.
IF YOU TAKE YOURSELF OUT OF THE WAY GOD WILL TAKE YOU ALL THE WAY!